It was a shock when Mary discovered that the husband she just got married to was a Muslim. Her husband, Ahmed, who disguised to be called Mike, was thinking of how to find a virtuous lady.
He hoped to find one in a church which prompted him to started attending church services. He joined the workforce immediately and he was very active. He was a center of attraction to the innocent ladies who hoped for his proposal.
Among the bevy of ladies in the church, he spot Mary, a lady who was passionate for God, a talented singer, and of a good character. Every brother wanted to take her to the altar. However, it was unfortunate that she agreed to go with Mike. Her dream and desire was to get married to a man who was also vibrant for God. Little did she know that he was a chameleon.
The brief story narrated above is a fiction. However, it reflects some people's experiences of marriages built on pretence. Experiences like this have been narrated to singles who are perturbed and confused on how to find the right partner.
To avoid experiences like that of Mary, some have concluded that spiritual vibrancy is not the only criterion to look out for or consider when choosing whom to marry. Beyond that, there other things to consider.
God leads his children to the right partner in diverse ways. He cannot be boxed into a particular religious system. Yours is that you should ensure that the leadings you claimed to have received is truly from God and not your own motives. In addition to that, there are proven counsels by experts that can guide your steps as well which will be shared in this post.
• Desire a marriage partner. It is not just to get married to someone to acquire reputation, to be addressed with Mr. and Mrs title, or to become mother or father of four children. Rather, desire to have a marriage that glorifies and brings pleasure to God. ..The desire of the righteous shall be granted"( Pro.10:24)
• Pray about it. Finding a virtuous woman and faithful man is a good thing. And God is faithful to give good things to those who ask Him including marriage. "If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?"Matthew 7:11 No earthly parent will give a harmful thing to a child, and God is more loving than earthly parents. Be sure, therefore, that God will give you a partner after Hiso ownheart.
• Have a deep sleep. God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam while He took his rib to form a woman and brought her to him. Taking a deep sleep implies resting on and trust in God's Word as He prepares and equip the bone of your bones for you. You need not to be anxious about marriage. Do not allow pressure from parents and peers to push you into a pit. Get busy with God's purpose for your life while God forms your Mr. or Mrs. Right for you.
• Make yourself as good as the type of the person you desire. If you desire a pastor as a partner, you must build yourself up in the things of God. Position yourself in God's will, purge yourself of every impurity, and exhibit the qualities you want in your mate.
• Choose a marriage partner who has the same beliefs as yours. A christian should a marry Christian who is not just a churchgoer, but also a genuine child of God. The church is like an hospital that provides cure for sick people. There are spiritually sick people who need genuine salvation to be healed in the church. This requires that you open your spiritual eyes to discern a real child of God. Allow God's Spirit to speak to you.
• Anyone you want to marry should be the type that you're compatible with, 'Two cannot together except they be agreed',
(Amos 3:3). God will not lead you to someone that you will always disagree with. Compatibility does not necessarily means similarities, but it also includes the ability to go and get along despite your differences.
• Man is made up of the spirit, soul, and body. Choose someone who agrees with you in those three compartments.
• Seek Godly counsels from god-fearing elders and from the Word of God. God's Word contains all things that make for life and godliness including marriage. When the Bible forms the foundation of your steps, you can be sure of success because the Scripture is the only sure foundation.
May every single be granted the favour to choose right and have a successful marriage.
@ Gbemiro Solomon Ojekunle
October 3, 2022.
And, I would add to this prayer that every marriage be one of respect and exploration so the two grow together and not apart.